Culling of the Heart
by unolespirit
Summary: Cullen finds himself a new Templar stationed at the Ferelden Circle of Magi. All seems to go well until he has a run in with a young mage named Amell. Can love truly blossom in such a dark place? Takes place pre-Origins, then extends into the Origins time-line. Cullen/Amell with some suggested Amell/Alistair. Rated M for later chapters for smut/violence/language.
1. Chapter 1 - A Wild Mage Appears!

**This is my first ever full fledged fanfic so please bear with me lol. This story takes place pre-Origins as well as coincides with the Origins timeline. Story surrounds Cullen and his infatuation with the female mage Solona Amell. This fic was influenced by the Cullen Romance mod and Karmas Origins Companion mod, though the content is geared more towards my headcanon lol. I'm actually pretty surprised that my first fic is a Cullen one given my obsession with Fenris xD but I hope you all enjoy it just as well.**

**All characters and Dragon Age belongs to Bioware! I do not claim any as my own! However content is mine ;P**

**Please R&R! POV is mostly third-person omniscient, but some chapters will focus mainly on one character at a time.**

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Chapter 1

The tall stone tower loomed over head as it made itself prominent against the setting sky. The newly appointed Templar, Cullen, took it all in awe as the creaky wooden boat made its way across the water towards his new home.

He was a mere 19 years old when he took his Templar vows, but he had been a child of the Chantry most his life. His parents had been victims of an illness that had struck his village when he was only 5 years old. Luckily he had evaded the illness, but being made orphan, the Chantry was the only place he could go. He first resented the thought of being there; being so young and thrust into a life you had yet to understand, but after a few short years, he had developed a love for the sword and the Knight-Commander certainly was not blind to the skill the boy possessed.

He was thrust into training almost immediately, learning strict discipline, the ways of the Chantry, as well as the dangers of mages. Cullen had never given much thought to mages before, he knew they existed, but they seemed like a far off truth, but now here he was being taught how to hunt and kill them. He was practically a natural with the ability of sapping mana; this pleased the Knight-Commander immensely.

Finally, after some years of rigorous training, the young Cullen was finally able to take his vows, and he was given his first dose of lyrium. Not even a week after he had taken his vows had the transfer papers come to his room. _You are hereby instated to the Circle of Magi tower overlooking Lake Calenhad in Ferelden. _

"You are to leave immediately." The Knight-Commander added.

So here he was, on his way to his first ever station, and he prayed to Andraste that he wouldn't mess this opportunity up.  
The tower looked so at peace as he approached, he was surprised at the bustle of the place when he entered.

There were mages everywhere, and more Templars than he has ever seen in one place walking about the corridors and standing aside each entrance. Cullen swallowed hard; he felt so out of place even though he was a Templar just as them.  
He noticed some of the mages giving him glares through slanted eyelids. He shuddered. He had no idea what was warranting those looks, but he didn't like it.  
He was a new Templar, so young and naive to the atrocities some Templars inflict upon the mages.

Soon he was approached by two older gentlemen. One wore the armor of the Knight-Commander, and the other an elaborate robe, the First Enchanter he presumed.  
"Hello. You must be the Cullen I've heard so much about. My name is Greagor." The Knight-Commander extended his hand towards Cullen.  
Cullen took his hand and shook it firmly.  
"And this," Greagor gestured to the gray-haired man next to him, "is the First Enchanter, Irving."  
"Pleased to meet you, Cullen." Irving said, his voice old and wise.  
Cullen nodded towards him.

"Let's get you set up in the Templar quarters shall we?" Greagor directed to Cullen.  
Cullen nodded and followed the two men through the large doorway that lead to the apprentice quarters.

"This is the lower mages quarters," Irving pointed out, "this is where the apprentices stay and learn until they are brought for their harrowing."  
"You'll be patrolling here often." Greagor added.  
"Excuse me," Cullen interjected, "but what is a harrow-oof!"  
Suddenly Cullen found himself on the cold floor of the tower with the wind knocked out of him. He glanced to the side near his feet and saw a young female mage lying there as well.

The girl, somewhere in her late teens he guessed, slowly peered up at him through thick lashes. For a second their eyes met, then her eyes flew open and she hurried to scramble to her feet.  
"I am SO sorry!" she shouted, face burning.  
"Amell!" Greagor boomed, "What do you think you're doing charging through the halls in this manner?"  
"I-" she started.  
"Now Greagor," Irving interrupted, "surely even a young girl such as Solona needs to have some fun during her life." He gave the girl a quick reassuring wink.  
"She is to _behave_, as all mages should, Irving!"  
The two elder fellows began bickering.

Cullen brought himself to his feet, adjusting his armor as he did so. The girl, Amell was it, stood there with downcast eyes and red cheeks. Cullen's mind noted how her lavender-tinted raven hair nicely complemented her red-tinged cheeks. Realizing what he was thinking, he quickly shook the thought from his head.  
So young and so naive to the dangers the mages possess.  
She lifted her gaze at him and mouthed a wordless "sorry" to the new Templar.  
He smiled at her, letting her know she was forgiven.

Soon Greagor and Irving had finished their argument and their attention was turned back to the younger bodies accompanying them in the corridor.  
Irving cleared his throat. "Solona, please head back to your chamber, and do try to watch where you're going next time."  
"Yes First Enchanter." she complied sheepishly before heading through a door down the hall.  
Cullen's eyes followed her as she retreated, mesmerized by how silent her footfalls were on the stone floor.  
"Cullen." Greagor called, bringing the Templar back to attention.  
"Yes Knight-Commander."  
"Without further delays, please accompany me to your quarters." Greagor extended a hand in the direction of the hallway before them.  
Cullen followed him vacuously all the way up two more levels before finding himself in an empty room with a single bed, small vanity, armoire and a sectioned off area for bathing. He looked around the unfamiliar room, noticing his bags had already been delivered there by the elf he had seen at the entrance to the tower.  
"I'll leave you to it then." Greagor started, "I expect to see you in the grand hall for supper in two hours."  
Cullen nodded.  
When Greagor had left, he dropped himself heavily onto the small bed, his armor clattering as he did so. He glanced up at the tall stone ceiling above him, reveling in the intricate architecture.  
"Home sweet home I suppose."


	2. Chapter 2 - Light in the Darkness

**Now we get into Solona's back story a little bit. I hope you enjoy it, please R&R ^^**

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Chapter 2

Solona fell onto the bottom bunk she had been assigned in one of the crowded rooms for apprentices. She sighed deeply, placing a hand over her eyes.  
_What an interesting Templar. _She thought.  
She had never met a new initiate, but she imagined they'd be the same mage-hating type she had always known, but this…Cullen…hadn't seemed frightful or hateful towards her at all, even after plowing him over in the hall. She smiled to herself.

Soon her thoughts drifted back to the first time she ever met a Templar. It had to have been about nine years ago. She was eight, if she recalled correctly. She had been visiting Kirkwall with her mother; they had gone to see her cousin Gamlen's estate but were turned away when it had been made apparent that he had turned over the once great Amell estate to a group of slavers to settle a gambling debt. Her mother was furious! She stormed her way back to the docks determined to find the first boat back to Ferelden, dragging the young Solona behind her.

When they had finally secured passage back home, Revka lead Solona to a small cabin where they would stay till they reached the shores of Ferelden.  
Later that night, Solona grew bored and wandered out onto the upmost deck of the ship, leaning over the bow to watch the water below. She wasn't up there long when her mother discovered her missing, and went to chase her down.  
"Solona!" her mother yelled over the sound of the waves.  
Solona whipped around and saw her fuming mother stomping towards her, frightened, she took a step back towards the bow, but the deck was slick from the splashing waves, causing Solona to lose her footing and slip right over the bow.

She thought she had heard her mother calling out for her again, but everything around her had become muffled. The sky and water turned black as night, and all she could see was a faint shimmer amidst the darkness. She moved closer to the small light and reached her hand out to touch it. It was warm, like a fire, but it didn't burn her, in fact it felt overwhelmingly comfortable, so she embraced it. When she did, the light grew and enveloped her in it. With a flash, the light suddenly dispersed from her and she found herself standing on the deck of the ship once again. Dumbfounded, she turned to face her mother again, but what she saw on her mother's face took her by surprise. What was once anger was now fear. To put it lightly, her mother was mortified! Her mother stomped across the wooden planks of the deck below, closing the gap between her and Solona. Solona whimpered when her mother yanked her by the arm.  
"What did you just do?!" her mother demanded.  
"I don't know!" she whined back.  
"You are not my daughter." Her mother spat, thrusting Solona's arm away as if it disgusted her.

Her mother didn't say another word to her the rest of the way back to Ferelden. Solona still didn't know what exactly had happened to her, and her mother certainly wasn't giving her any answers, ignoring her anytime Solona tried to bring it up. Soon the boat docked, allowing them to set foot back on solid ground. After that first step, Revka was dragging her daughter to the nearest Chantry. As they approached the small building, that was the first time Solona laid eyes on an armor-clad Templar, and certainly not her last. Her mother came to a halt in front of the Templars standing aside the door, thrusting Solona towards them.  
"This girl is a mage." Her mother said flatly.  
The Templars turned their helmed faces towards the girl before looking at each other. The one nearest Solona shrugged and took Solona by the shoulder, leading her into the Chantry. She turned to face her mother, but she avoided the girls gaze and began explaining what she had witnessed to the other Templar outside. The doors shut behind them, sealing off the last memory the girl would ever have of her mother.  
Solona was kept in that Chantry for a couple of days until three unfamiliar Templars came to escort her to the Circle of Magi. After several days of travel, she began to grow accustom to the silence. It was obvious these men held no sympathy towards her, and one seemed to even go out of his way to glower at her when she found him looking in his direction.  
When they finally reached the tower looking over the lake, she was more than happy to lose her company. When the large iron doors opened, Solona was greeted with the hustle and bustle of the mage tower. She was amazed with all that was around her. Mages, men and women alike, were running around in elegant robes, carrying armfuls of parchment and shiny baubles. She was in awe.

Suddenly a noise above her shook Solona from her memories.  
"Solona." A familiar voice called out to her.  
She looked up at the bunk above her through the spaces between her fingers.  
"Yes, Jowan?"  
"I heard there was a new Templar in the tower, is it true?" Jowan asked sheepishly.  
"Yes, it's true. I just saw him in fact." She replied, hoping her smile wouldn't seep into her words.  
"What did you think?"  
"Don't worry Jowan; I don't think we'll need to worry about him much. I didn't get the impression that he dislikes mages."  
"Yet." Jowan added in a disgruntled tone.  
"We'll see…" her words trialed off. She hoped he wouldn't come to hate mages. It would be nice to have at least one Templar in the whole tower that didn't give her a disgusted look when she walked by.  
The kindness she saw in his eyes was unmistakable, and it gave her hope that not all Templars were cruel.  
_PLEASE let this one be different. _She prayed. She didn't know exactly why she needed this so much, all she knew was that she did _need _it.


	3. Chapter 3 - Small Token of Appreciation

**Sorry for the long wait for this update! I've been pretty busy as of late and hadn't had much time to write! ^^; I hope this chapter will make up for the wait.**

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Chapter 3

A year came and went, and all things seemed normal for the circle tower. Cullen and Solona had bumped into each other more than a handful of times during his patrols, and neither would ever admit if that had been more than a mere coincidence. Cullen constantly heard how evil and power hungry mages were supposed to be, but he had yet to see any evidence supporting that logic first hand. He had begun to think it was just an old wives tale cooked up to keep mage sympathizing Templars to a bare minimum, that was until he was assigned to guard duty at his first ever harrowing.

The harrowing chamber was cold and silent as Cullen stood there in line with three fellow Templars. The second Templar to his right was the one who was to drop the executioners axe were the harrowing to go wrong.  
After a few minutes of watching the elder mages preparing a blue glowing concoction in the middle of the room, a young male stepped in, still sleepy-eyed from being woken in the middle of the night to be given his test. Cullen recalled seeing this particular mage once or twice in the tower, but nothing had ever stood out to him, certainly nothing that warranted the need to be cautious of this man.

A long stretch of time passed, or at least it seemed that way as no one in the chamber moved a muscle once the young mage had entered the fade. Greagor's mouth was drawn into a thin straight line which made Cullen uneasy. Cullen's eyes began to flit around the room, gathering everyone's expressions, and the general consensus wasn't a good one.  
"It's been too long." Greagor stated, voice cold.  
"No." Irving cut in, "Give him a little longer, please."  
"If we wait any longer-" Greagor went to counter, but was cut off by a blast of mana sending himself as well as everyone else in the room, mage and Templar alike, flying into the hard stone walls.  
What appeared before Cullen's eyes next would be the breaking point of his view of mages forever.

The young mages body was steadily lifted not even a foot off the ground, back arched in a twisted manner, mouth agape. The sound that poured from the mages mouth caused Cullen's blood to curdle. It was a mix of a scream of horror coupled with a sickening gurgle, as someone would sound if they were drowning. Cullen watched on with horror as the mages body began to contort and the scream turned into a low throaty growl. In a matter of seconds, an abomination stood in the center of the room; none of his training could have possibly prepared Cullen for this moment, he was frozen with shock.  
"Templars to your feet!" he heard Greagor shout from across the room.  
The other three Templars hurriedly got to their feet as Cullen still lay on the stone floor.  
"That's an order, Cullen!"  
Cullen nodded vacuously as he fought his nerves to stand. He gripped the hilt of his broadsword just as the abomination turned on the executioner. The senior Templar took charge at the demon, but the demon had no plans of being cut down tonight. Cullen's eyes grew wide as the abominations hand broke through the Templars armor as if it was no thicker than a piece of parchment; blood splayed all around them. The demon removed his hand and the Templar crumpled to the ground at the creature's feet.  
Cullen felt a wave of nausea build in his stomach, and he swallowed back the bile gathering in his throat. The other two Templars that were assigned as guards rushed the demon together; but neither made it within range of their swords before they were flung away, hitting several mages as they slid across the room.  
"Cullen, to me!" the Knight-Commander ordered.  
Greagor rushed the demon and managed to catch it off-guard. A loud clang rang out through the chamber as Greagor's blade collided with the creature's hardened hand. Cullen watched intently waiting for an opening. _There._  
Cullen ran head-on at the abomination, the tip of his sword dragging across the stone as he crossed the floor of the chamber. A threatening scream erupted from Cullens lips as he brought his blade up, slicing the demon in one fell swoop.  
A shrill cry filled the chamber as blood burst from the wound leaving the abomination to fall to the floor. Cullen's breath was ragged as he continued to cling to his blade, as if the world would disappear from beneath him if he were to let go.  
He felt a strong hand clap him on the shoulder.  
"Good job, son."  
Cullen nodded.

Luckily, they suffered no casualties, save the abomination-turned mage. The injured mages and Templars were taken below to be healed, but no manner of healing would save Cullen from those memories. His outlook on mages began to take a different shape that night. He was far from hating them, but he definitely wasn't about to give his trust to any either.

* * *

Cullen was given a few days to recuperate, but was set back out on patrol within the same week. He no longer gives a kind smile to the mages that pass; instead his face is steeled from all expression. There is one mage however that would not be turned away by the sudden change in the young Templar.

Solona had been spending a lot of time in the circle's library in the past few months. Much to her delight, Cullen seemed to be stationed to patrol the library often. When questioned by Jowan, she was quick to deny that that was the real reasons she was spending so much time "studying".  
Per usual, she had her long black tresses done up in a high ponytail, the ends brushing against her back and shoulders. She had also taken to wearing a tighter robe than usual, showing off her developing curves nicely. Though much to her dismay, she seemed to be drawing attention from everyone _but _the one person she wanted.

She straightened her robes, gathered up her books and parchments and headed to the library once again. She all but held her breath as she took the steps up the stairs and to the usually cluttered library. Solona sent a silent prayer to the Maker that he would be there today, since he had been absent the rest of the week.  
Her footfalls came to a halt when she turned into the doorway. There he was; standing aside the far left wall of the library. Her brow knit together when she noticed the solemn look on his face. Solona made a beeline to a table near Cullen and set her books down discreetly. She pretended not to notice his presence as her fingers brushed over the shelved books across from Cullen. She would pause every now and then to press a delicate finger to her full lips, stealing a glance in his direction, but he seemed to take no note of her. Solona huffed under her breath as she grabbed an armful of books from the shelves before her.  
She was determined to sashay her way back over to her table, but on her way she "tripped" directly in front of Cullen, sending her books flying out in front of her. She must have put a bit too much effort into the scene, because before she could stop herself, her feet had lost contact with the ground.  
"Oh sod it." She breathed, expecting to make contact with the floor below, but was pleasantly surprised when a pair of strong hands grasped her, halfway cradling her back.  
Her eyes flew to the face above her, landing on a blushing Cullen.  
"A-are you alright?" he stammered.  
She nodded, trying to hide the smile that tugged at the edges of her lips. Cullen carefully placed her back on her feet before taking his stoic stance once again.  
"Thank you, Cullen." She said ever so sweetly towards the still blushing Templar.  
He nodded curtly, eyes focused out in front of him, avoiding her gaze.  
Solona smirked despite herself and bent down to gather the books she had so carelessly strewed before her.

Cullen tried his best to not pay attention to the petite mage at his feet, but the gentleman in him refused to just ignore her. He closed his eyes and let out a heavy sigh before bending to help her gather up her texts. Solona's eyes trailed up his gloved hands to his handsome face, the blaze in his cheeks never faltering. A soft chuckle resonated in her throat, causing Cullen to finally face her.  
"Wh-what?" he asked her.  
Solona shook her head furiously. "Nothing." She responded, stifling another laugh.  
His face contorted with confusion. "Tell me." He half asked, half demanded.  
Solona raised her grey eyes, meeting his hazel ones. Cullen's breath caught in his throat causing him to swallow hard. He held her gaze for a moment before realizing she had rested her fingertips lightly on top of his hand. Just when he thought his cheeks couldn't burn any brighter, he felt more heat rush to his face, now covering his ears as well.  
Solona's expression softened, letting her lips part ever so slightly. Her eyes fell from his and onto his sculpted mouth; she began to lean in closer to him, attempting to bridge the space between them.  
Cullen shot up to his feet, nearly knocking the poor girl over in the process.  
"I uh-I think I hear….hear a…a…." He stuttered out, pointing in all directions. "I should uh….go-"  
He hurriedly walked across the library and disappeared behind a wall of bookcases, leaving Solona there on the floor looking dumbfounded. She blinked her eyes repeatedly, shocked, and almost hurt at his reaction.  
Disappointed, she gathered up the remaining books and took a seat at the table where her belongings waited.

* * *

Hours came and went, and Solona continued to burry herself in her studies. Her embarrassment still nagged at the back of her mind, causing her to lose herself even more in the texts before her. She had been so ensnared in the books that she never noticed Cullen take his place back at the wall beside her table. He shifted his gaze upon her more often than he'd care to admit.

Soon mages and Templars alike began to filter out of the library, and the glow of the lamps seemed to lessen as most were turning in for the night. Due to the fact that no mages were aloud out of their rooms at night without at least one Templar present, Cullen volunteered to stay in the library until every mage had gone.  
A couple more hours passed and the last of the mages had finally left, all except one. Solona had been so engrossed in the books before her; she hadn't felt herself dozing off until her head already lay on a book before her, forming a small trickle of drool.  
Cullen took a final lap around the library before concluding that Solona was indeed, the only one left. He walked over to her sleeping figure and looked down at her soft, sleeping features. _She's so beautiful when she sleeps._ The thought crept into his head before he was able to stop himself. He shook it away before turning his attention back to the snoozing woman before him. He stood there a moment before deciding what to do. Cullen knew he couldn't just leave her there like this and also that it wouldn't be appropriate for just the two off them to be there alone all night either. Soon he was gathering up the books her delicate face wasn't resting on, and placed them back on the shelves that they belonged to.

When almost all of the texts were back in their places, Cullen turned his attention back to Solona. He stepped close to her and sighed to himself, cursing himself for what he was about to do. He carefully slid the chair she was seated in away from the table, but not too far as to make sure her head didn't fall from the table. He gently scooped his left arm around her back, resting the hand onto her side, and then bent slightly to hook his other arm beneath her knees. In one swift motion, he lifted her from the table, adjusting his arms to assure her head didn't fling back and jolt her awake. Cullen swept his head from side to side to make sure there were no on lookers, and seeing there were none, cradled her body close to his armor before making the trip back to the apprentices quarters.

He made it halfway down the stairs when he felt her shift against him. His face turned a crimson red as he stole a look down into his arms to see if she had awoken. He let loose the breath he had been holding when he saw that she wasn't awake. The sleeping Solona nestled her face deeper against the cold steel on his chest and gave a sleepy groan. Cullen swallowed hard as he began to feel a warm sensation stir in his abdomen.

Cullen tried to think about anything and everything other than the warm body in his arms. He thanked the Maker when he finally arrived at her room. Careful not to drop her, he bent slightly to open the wooden door before him, pushing it lightly with his boot until it opened wide enough for him to step inside. His hazel eyes scanned the dark room for her bed, hopefully there would only be one empty bunk. Cullen was thankful when he spotted it, and that it was a lower bunk at that. He let out a low sigh as he quietly inched them towards her bed.

When he reached the edge of her bunk, he was careful to not wake the mage on the top bunk, and as quiet as his armor would let him, laid her on the small mattress. His gloved hand reached down and pulled the thin blanket over her sleeping figure. As his hand came up to her chin, he rested it there for a moment, staring at her peaceful face. Then her face shifted slightly, as if she were in a dream. Her lips parted and Cullen leaned in a little closer to hear her whisper something.  
"C-Cullen…." Her voice was barely above a breath, but there was no mistaking what he heard.  
May he be damned to the void, but Maker, this woman knew how to make him blush.  
Suddenly there was a small shifting in the bunk above.  
"Solona?" a male voice rang out.  
Cullen was so startled and embarrassed to be caught, he tried to jerk his head up to leave, but ended up colliding with the top bunk with a resounding thud! He cursed under his breath, bringing a hand up to cradle the newly sore spot on the back of his cranium. Cullen, carefully this time, ducked his head and backed away from the bunk and looked up, meeting the male mage's gaze. He froze.  
"A Templar?..." Jowan questioned himself aloud.  
Cullen racked his brain for an explanation, but the right words wouldn't form.  
"I-uh….sh-she f-fell asleep and I….I uh…." Cullen stammered, wringing his hands in front of him. He didn't even finish the sentence when he whipped around on his heels and rushed out the door, leaving Jowan with a dumbfounded look on his face.

Jowan blinked the confusion away and bent down to look at his sleeping friend. His eyes scanned her and he was relieved when she seemed to be unharmed. He sat back up and shrugged before laying back down to go back to sleep.  
That night, Solona had a very pleasant dream, involving a more than pleasant Templar. She smiled happily in her sleep.

* * *

The next morning Solona woke up rather refreshed. She stretched with a happy moan, catching attention from the bunk above her.  
"You had a visitor last night." Jowan said matter-of-factly.  
"Oh?" she asked innocently.  
Jowan slung his legs over the side of his bunk before dropping to his feet in front of her.  
"Indeed." He responded, a hint of play in his voice. "It was a Templar in fact. One might even say handsome if they were into that sort of thing."  
Solona eyed him sarcastically through half-closed lids.  
"I think he may have even left you with a kiss." He smirked impishly.  
"You lie!" Solona tried to laugh the thought of it away, but the heat in her cheeks betrayed her.  
"Oh, do I?" he countered.  
Solona huffed as she hurled her pillow at Jowan's head.  
They both shared a laugh as Jowan plopped down on the bunk beside her, clutching the soft missile.  
Jowan sighed, "Of course he didn't really, but I could tell that he wanted to." He glanced at his friend through the corner of his eye.  
Solona sat there staring straight ahead of her with a far off look in her eyes.  
"You know," Jowan placed his hand on her shoulder, "there is a merchant passing through today. Perhaps you should pick up a little something to show him your thanks." He gave her a little wink.  
"What in Thedas could _I _possibly give _him_?!" Solona asked hopelessly.  
"Well…there is _one_ thing, but I don't think any merchant has _that_ for sale!" Jowan immediately erupted in a mock-evil laugh.  
Solona's face whipped towards Jowan, her expression upturned in an angry scowl. Jowan could almost feel the heat radiating from her.  
He put his hands up in mock defeat. "Or, you could go look at the merchant's wares." He laughed as he watched her face turn from anger to sheer annoyance in an instant.  
Solona pursed her lips and glared at her friend. He shrugged questioningly towards her and her face finally softened.  
"Fine." She sighed. "I do have some silvers saved up for a rainy day. This is as good a reason as any to use them." She placed her hands on her knees and pushed herself to a standing position and stretched.  
"Let me get changed and meet you there?" she asked her friend.  
Jowan nodded and took his leave.

Several moments later, Solona had adorned a new, clean robe, gathered her small coin purse and headed down the stairs to the first floor where the merchant would be set up.  
It wasn't often that merchants came to the tower, but there was always the rare occasion when one passed through. It was usually a merchant who had come across some lyrium and was looking to sell it to a Templar, but of course that wasn't announced, so in order to hide their true motive, they opened sales to mages as well for the rest of their wares.

She had a happy bounce in her step as she bounded down the remainder of the steps. When she emerged in the foyer her eyes scanned around looking for Jowan. When she found him, he was already standing at the merchants stall, waving her over.  
She walked over and took a place beside her friend and let her gaze roam around the shiny baubles before her. Out of her peripherals, she saw that Jowan had selected an elegant silver chain adorned with filigree and was handing the merchant a handful of coins.  
"Who's that for?" she questioned. "Surely not for you."  
"Not that it's any of your concern, but a young lady here in the tower." Jowan turned his nose upward at her.  
"Ooh, is it for me?" she snickered.  
"NO!" Jowan said slightly louder than he had intended.  
Solona chuckled. "Relax, I'm only teasing."

Solona stood at the stall for a good half hour, studying each article carefully, trying to find the perfect gift for Cullen. She finally had her eye on a large bronze ring with an inlay of ivory in the shape of the symbol of Andraste. It wasn't overly fancy, but she hoped he would like it none the less. She was about to reach out for it when the merchant spoke out.  
"Oi! Mage! Are ye goin' to buy somthin' or what?" he asked her gruffly.  
Her hand stopped mid-air and she turned toward the man with a slight look of disgust on her face.  
"Well." Solona stated. "I _was_ but I don't appreciate being treated in such a manner." She placed her hands on her hips and took a step away from the table. "Perhaps I shall just wait until the next merchant comes and give my coin to _them._ Maybe they'll appreciate it a bit better." She took another step away.  
The merchant looked at her in shock.  
"W-wait. I di'nt mean any disrespect m'lady. P-please, take your time." He motioned towards the table.  
Solona smiled slyly and stepped closer to the table once again.  
"Hmm." She pressed a finger against her chin. "I was looking for a piece of scrap metal for a spell. How much is this trinket?" she motioned towards the ring she had been eyeing.  
"My good lady, this is no mere scrap. It has-"  
Solona put her hand up to stop the man's rambling. "How much?" she gave him a grave look.  
"Fifteen silver."  
She felt her stomach drop, that was a bit more than she could afford to pay at the moment, but she kept her face steely and attempted to barter with the man.  
"I can give you seven." She told him with finality.  
"But surely it's worth at least ten." The man pleaded.  
Solona drew her mouth in a thin line before giving in.  
"Fine." She sighed and began counting out the coins to give to the seller.  
The merchant grinned as he gathered the coins from her. "Would you like a wrapping for it?"  
"No." she grabbed the ring from his hand and marched away.  
Now how was she going to give it to him? Her mind wandered as she headed back up the stairs.

* * *

As she made her way to the grand hall, she was happy to see that most residents of the tower were still sitting down for breakfast. She stood in the doorway looking for Jowan. When she had caught his attention, she motioned for him to come over. He crossed the hall at a quick pace.  
"What is it, what's wrong?" he asked frantically.  
"N-nothing." She answered, a little taken back by his worried state. "I just got this," she said producing the ring for Jowan to see, "and I don't know how to give it to him. I'm too scared to give it to him in person." She looked down at her hands sheepishly.  
Jowan smiled knowingly and gave her a suggestion.  
"What if you put it in his room while he's not there."  
"But what if I get caught?" her eyes searched the grand hall to make sure that the Templar was indeed away from his room.  
"Come on, I'll help you." Jowan reassured, taking her by the hand, leading her towards the stairs that lead up to the Templars quarters.  
Solona had never been there before and would be lying if she didn't admit that she was a little afraid of venturing in there uninvited; but Jowan seemed determined in their quest as he pulled her along.

As they passed through the large double doors that lead to the long circling hallway full of rooms, they were stopped by two fully-helmed Templars.  
"Halt." One said, putting a hand up. "What business do you have here?"  
Solona's breath caught in her throat as she was sure they were doomed, but Jowan pushed past her and responded with confidence.  
"We have an important delivery for the Templar, Cullen. It must be dropped at his room immediately." Jowan straightened his body, trying to not look so small next to the armored men.  
The Templars looked at one another and just shrugged.  
"This way." The other spoke up.  
The one that spoke began to lead them down the corridor to a small room about half-way down. He motioned his hand toward the door and both mages peered inside.

Solona noted the small but quaint room. The smell of Cullen filled her nose as she stepped inside and stopped for a brief moment to take it in. She searched the room, looking for a good spot to place the ring so Cullen would see it when he came back to his room. Her eyes landed on the small side table by the bed and crossed the room to it. She turned the ring over in her fingers as she began second-guessing her actions. Jowan walked up behind her and clasped a hand on her shoulder.  
"He'll love it." He told her reassuringly.  
She gave her friend a soft smile. She caringly placed the ring on the center of the small table and stared at it. It almost stood out too much against the wood, or perhaps that was just her conscience speaking.  
"Here." Jowan's voice brought her back to the present, and she noticed Jowan was attempting to hand her a small piece of parchment.  
She took the piece of paper in her hand, as well as the quill he produced. Solona scribbled a small note on the parchment and placed it on the table, propped up on the ring.  
She glanced at the ring one more time before she and Jowan exited the room and headed back to the grand hall; finally noticing her empty stomach.

* * *

Later that night after Cullen had finished his patrol he trudged back to his room, feet dragging the whole way. He kicked the door shut behind him and crossed the room toward his bed. He stopped dead in his tracks as he noticed a small shimmer on the side table where he was about to place his gauntlets. He set them off to the side and took the ring and note, one in each hand. He turned the parchment over and back again before reading the short message written in an unfamiliar hand.  
_"Thank you. xx"_  
Regardless of never having seen her handwriting before, he knew of only one person that would be thanking him.  
"Solona." He whispered, adoration thick on his lips.  
He dropped down on his bed, neglecting to take off the rest of his armor. He held the ring and note above his face and took in each with long regard. He thumbed the ring, gliding a calloused pad across the inlay and smiled in spite of himself before slipping it onto his left index finger. Cullen brought that hand down and rested it on his forehead as he continued to stare at the note. He let his mind wander to the thought of her here in his room, writing the small, usually insignificant, letters on the parchment that filled his chest with joy.  
He drifted off in that state, his hand still gripping her note tight to his chest.

Cullen would wear the ring from that day forward. When asked about the origins of the ring, he would just smile and say "it was a gift" though he would never say who it was from. It was now one of his most cherished possessions, something he would never part with.


	4. Chapter 4 - Falling for You

**Finally have a new chapter up! I'll do my best to update at least once a week! ^^  
Please R&R!**

* * *

Chapter 4

Two more years transpired, and Cullen was given so many duties to keep him busy, he could hardly keep up. His most reoccurring guard was for the mages quarters, so it was very rare that he saw Solona. His thoughts drifted to her from time to time, but he would allow himself no more than that; he had a duty to uphold.

Around that time, dark rumors had grown in the tower. There were speculations that a blood mage had surfaced, and had been practicing their art at night; whether it was just a rumor or not, Greagor had put every Templar in the tower on alert. All Templars had been assigned night shifts, two at a time. Having regular daily duties as well as a night shift, was really starting to take its toll on Cullen. After what he had seen at his first harrowing, he was determined to not let a blood mage loose on his watch.

The rumors had also reached the tower mages and caused disruption among them as well. Irving had held a meeting with each enchanter and mentor, who passed down the message to the rest of the mages and apprentices. The message was clear, any mage or mages practicing blood magic should turn themselves in quickly to avoid further punishment. It was supposed to mean that if they turned themselves in, they may receive mercy, but the mages knew better than to believe that. The Chantry made it quite clear that the punishment for practicing blood magic was execution.

A couple months passed and there was no true sign of any actual blood magic taking place, but the Templars' watch didn't recede. Mages started getting nervous as Greagor ordered Templars to take suspicious mages in for questioning. Several mages had been taken in already. They would go missing for days, and when they returned they would never breathe a word of what happened during their time away. The uneasiness among them caused some mages to make mistakes as they practiced spells, and overall they ended up coming off as suspicious, causing more to be taken in for questioning.

* * *

One day, as Cullen was in the grand hall, taking a much needed break for lunch, he overheard some other Templars talking.

"Have you heard?" one young Templar addressed another sitting near Cullen, "Greagor says thanks to the interrogations they have a narrowed down the blood mage as an apprentice."  
Cullen's ears perked up. Solona was still an apprentice. Was she in danger? Was _she _the blood mage?  
He quickly shook his head, no, there was no way she would be capable of doing anything so sinister.  
"Yeah I heard," the second Templar answered, "they're supposed to be taking the one suspected in right now."  
Cullen quickly began to scan the grand hall for any sign of Solona, surely she would be here. There were many familiar faces among the mages and apprentices in the room, but not the raven haired one he was searching for. His heart dropped to his gut. One of his worst nightmares seemed to be unfolding in front of him. He stood from the table with a jerk, pushing it across the floor an inch or two. The other Templars sitting around it looked at him, puzzled. Cullen nodded curtly and turned to leave the room.

His footfalls were quick as he passed through the grand doors, exiting from the hall. The closer he got to the apprentices' quarters, the faster he moved. He had almost broken out into a sprint as he raced up the stairs to the floor he hoped she was on. His heart beat hard in his chest the closer he came.

* * *

Solona sat alone in the apprentices' quarters. She had had company just a few minutes prior. She was sitting on her bunk reading a book she had borrowed from the library when three Templars had stormed into the room. As the door burst open her and the other two apprentices that were there nearly jumped out of their skins at the sound. She wasn't entirely coherent of the situation; she heard the Templars shouting and pointing at the other mages. One mage fell to the ground and began to cry, while the other just stood there frozen in place. Solona distinctly heard one of the Templars call them "blood mages" before they were hauled out of room, just shy of literally kicking and screaming.

Her body began to tremble slightly against her own will. She breathed a sigh of relief that the Templars had not suspected her of blood magic. She had heard the terrible whispers of what happens during the interrogations, and was glad to not have to go through it.  
Solona walked over to the large window on the far wall of the room. There were many windows in the tower, but there was a protective spell over all of them so no one could actually throw anything out of them…or anyone. Fortunately, Solona had found a counter spell in one of the many books at her disposal. In fact, it was a book that she had borrowed from Irving.  
Solona waved her hand over the window as she whispered the incantation. The window glowed a hazy blue, and then she could feel the wet breeze on her face from the lake below. Solona breathed in deep. It had been years since she could remember the feel of fresh air. When she had first come to the tower, mages were allowed some outside time once a week, but there were so many mages who attempted to escape that they got rid of it all together.

She suddenly realized how alone she was in the room. Solona took comfort in the warm breeze passing over her skin and decided to climb up onto the windowsill. She fit rather well in the window, as she brought her knees up to her chin. She stared out into the distance and let herself daydream about what sort of life she could have had outside the towers' walls.

* * *

Cullen's breath had become uneven as he finally reached the apprentices' quarters, but he didn't slow down a bit. He rushed towards the door that he knew to lead to her room. He only hesitated in his speed for an instant as he used his heavy boot to kick open the door. He used so much force that the large wooden door swung widely on its hinges and struck the stone wall with a resonating _slam!_ As soon as the door was open his eyes began to scan the room.

Opposite the door, in the large window, Solona had been lost in thought when Cullen burst into the room. The loud noise shook her from her day dreams, so much in fact that it literally shook her, and before Solona could catch herself, she felt herself slipping from the windowsill. Her eyes grew wide with sudden fear and a scream escaped her lips. Her hands grasped at the stone, but it was no use, too much of her weight had already shifted, she was beginning to fall.

The scream had drawn Cullen's eyes directly to the window. He tried to push his body as fast as he could to dart in her direction. He jumped over a trunk laying aside a bed as he ran towards the window. He reached out a hand to grab for her; his fingers brushed hers, but he was unable to catch a grip. He didn't even pause a second to think, he just reacted as he jumped out the window after her. A thought flashed through his mind as he was slightly surprised he was able to fit through the window with his armor; but then his mind was only focused on the task at hand, catching Solona.

"Shit" she hissed through her teeth. If she survived this, she would surely never hear the end of it. She closed her eyes, waiting for impact, until she heard a noise from above her. Her eyes shot open. She couldn't believe it. Not only was she falling to the dark water below, but now there was Cullen, several feet above her in the sky coming directly at her. She was in awe as she saw him clasp his arms to his sides, quickening his speed. She seemed to fall in slow motion in comparison. Cullen's face was fixed in a serious expression. As he approached her, he reached out a hand for her. Solona did her best to reach up towards him, but the force of the wind gave her much resistance.  
As soon as he reached her, he grasped her hand firmly and pulled her tight against his body. He clutched her in his arms and turned to shift himself below her. Solona was unsure how to react. A Templar, of all things had come to save her. No. Not just _any _Templar; Cullen. Solona scanned his face unsure. _Why would he do this?_  
Cullen seemed to be able to read her mind as he gave her a warm smile. He brought a hand up to her head and gently pressed her closer to his chest, bracing for impact. Soon the water came up to meet them and they broke the waters' surface with a loud _crack!_

Solona tried her best to catch a breath before the water swallowed her. Cullen however wasn't so lucky. Cullen had hit the water hard, shielding Solona from the initial impact, and had the wind knocked out of him. Solona searched through the dark water for the Templar, but he was sinking fast. Frantically, Solona swam through the murky water, searching for a sign of Cullen. She finally found him a few feet down and grabbed his arm as tightly as she could. Knowing full well if she didn't get Cullen to the surface right away, his life could be in danger. She said an incantation in her mind and prayed that it'd still work.  
A bright purple glow started at the palm of her hands and quickly spread out around them. This particular spell created a sort of shield that would push the water out of it, and she hoped it would trap some oxygen as well. As soon as they were surrounded by the mana shield, Solona willed them through the water and to the surface, still with an unconscious Cullen being held onto with one of her arms. The spell dispersed when she broke the waters' surface, and she was now left to drag him to shore on her own. Solona found it difficult swimming with only one arm, and a heavy weight in the other, but at least her mother had given her the gift of swimming lessons before shipping her off to the Circle.

After a few agonizing minutes, Solona finally brought the two of them up on shore, thankfully on the towers' side. She dragged Cullen as much onto land as her strength would allow and studied him quietly. Her heart sank. Cullen wasn't breathing. She didn't know what to do; she knew some healing arts, but nothing to bring breath back into a body! She searched her mind before coming up with a vague solution.  
She carefully leaned over Cullen's face, nerves rising in her stomach. She parted his lips slightly before bringing her mouth to his. His lips were cold as ice. She tried desperately to pass oxygen into his lungs, but nothing was working. She pulled herself up and laid Cullen's head in her lap, tears beginning to prick at her eyes.  
"This is all my fault!" she whined, "Why was I born a blighted mage?!"  
Wait. That was it. She _was _a mage, and pretty damned good with the elements too! She stifled her tears and set back to work. She focused on Cullen, attempting to zone in on the water in his lungs. When she found it, she tapped into her mana, guiding the water out of Cullen's lungs, up his throat and out his mouth.

When the water had passed Cullen's lips, he began to sputter, coughing up the remaining moisture. Solona laughed her tears away in relief, the now conscience Cullen still lying in her lap. Cullen inhaled deeply, trying to focus his eyes. Finally they landed upon her face.  
"Makers breath, you are a beautiful sight." He breathed, bringing a hand to the side of her face.  
She pressed her cheek into his palm. "I'm so glad you're alright. I was worried...worried you-"  
She was cut off by the sound of approaching feet.

Apparently a missing Templar and mage had not gone unnoticed and someone had informed the Knight-Commander of it. Greagor stomped down the shore towards them accompanied by three lesser-ranking Templars and the First Enchanter in tow. Irving was muttering some sort of pleadings to Greagor, but the Knight-Commander just ignored him. Greagor's face was masked in rage as he made his way to Solona and Cullen.  
"You! Mage!" Greagor screamed as he yanked Solona up by her arm. "Or shall I call you apostate?!"  
Solona winced at the sudden pain, grasping her arm, trying to wrench free of his grip.  
"Stop!" Cullen yelled, demanding attention from the surrounding party as he got to his feet.  
All eyes fell on him, and suddenly he felt less bold.  
"It-it was an accident." He told his audience. "It was my fault. She was just s-sitting in the window, and I caused her to fall." Heat seared his cheeks.  
"And what were you doing in her room, Templar?" Irving asked, genuinely curious.  
"Well, you see, I-" Cullen began to answer.  
"More importantly," Greagor spat, "How was the window open?!" he glared at the apprentice he still had in his clutch.  
"That was my doing, Greagor." Irving interjected. "I loaned Solona a book with the spell in it. I take full responsibility for her actions."  
"She still left the tower without permission, and must be punished!" Greagor countered.  
Cullen was the one to speak up this time. "Technically Knight-Commander, she wasn't alone. I did a-accompany her."  
"Yes." Greagor snapped, "And you shall be reprimanded for your actions as well!"  
"But Knight-Commander-" Cullen started.  
"You will be lucky I don't strip you of your position for this, rookie!" Greagor had turned his full attention to Cullen. "If you so much as _look_ at this mage again," he said pointing to Solona, "you will be shipped back to whatever Chantry you hail from, do you understand me?!"  
Cullen stood at attention "Yes, Knight-Commander." He replied as he clapped a fist to his chest.  
"I'll leave this mage to you, Irving. This time." Greagor commented towards the First Enchanter before turning to leave with the now four Templars.

Having been released from his grip, Solona slumped to the ground, burying her face in her hands.  
"My child," Irving cooed as he rested a hand on her shoulder, "everything will be alright, you will see." He then helped her back up to her feet.  
Solona's eyes fell on Cullen's back the entire walk back to the tower, her cage. He didn't even look at her once along the way, and she wondered if he would ever look at her again. The growing pit in her stomach seemed to make that answer for her.

* * *

_I know Greagor isn't actually quite that harsh in the game, but it helps with the story. Every story needs a bad guy, right? lol_


	5. Chapter 5 - A Farewell

**I was tempted to split this into two chapters, but decided against it since the break would be odd lol. I hope you enjoy it! ^^ Please R&R!**

* * *

Chapter 5

About two more winters had come and gone and Cullen had tried to keep his distance from Solona as much as possible. She did pass him in the tower halls every now and then, but he never met her eyes as she passed. He watched her longingly from afar instead. Greagor's threat to send him away had set him straight. He knew where his duty laid, and he knew it was wrong for him to have any sort of feelings for a mage; but the way her hips swayed in those tight fitting robes…no. He could not let himself think of such things. Despite his attempts to push down his feelings for Solona, her face haunted his dreams time and time again. He couldn't help but wonder how she was doing.

One evening as Cullen was enraptured in another daydream about the raven haired mage, a rapping on his door called him back to reality. Cullen shook his head and crossed his small room to the door. When he opened it, the Knight-Commander was standing in the threshold with a somber look on his face.

"There is to be a harrowing tonight," Greagor informed him, "and you are to act as executioner."

"Who is the taking part in the harrowing?" Cullen inquired.

His superior ignored his question. "You have shown great potential in your past harrowing duties, and I believe you are up to the task. Arrive at the harrowing chamber at 11 p.m. sharp."

"Yes Knight-Commander." Cullen confirmed, clapping a fist to his chest.

Greagor nodded before turning on his heel, retreating down the corridor.

Cullen turned his gaze towards the window and the sun in the sky. It was beginning to sink, so he assumed it was near 5 o'clock. He undressed and got into bed. He figured he should take a small nap in preparations for tonight; he needed to be at full attention if the mage turned into an abomination. He would dream of her once again that evening.

* * *

"Good night Jowan!" Solona called to the bunk above her as she pulled back the covers of her own to crawl in for the night.  
It had been a relatively peaceful day for Solona. She had finished her lessons early, so Senior Enchanter Torrin excused her for an early supper. She ended up staying in the grand hall late with some friends, but all the while she was searching for a particular blonde-haired Templar. Her good mood had dampened a little when she didn't spot him at all that night. Jowan finally convinced her to retire to their room when the Templars began to lock up the grand hall for the night.

When she was finally settled in her bunk, it wasn't long before she drifted off. It seemed that her eyes had only been shut a few seconds when she was jolted awake. She looked up through half-lids at two Templars standing above her, one near each end of her bunk. She gave a little shriek and one of the Templars put a finger to where his lips were behind his bulky helm. Solona fell silent, eyes still wide on the Templars. One of them motioned for her to get up, and she complied warily. Once she had slipped on her shoes, the other Templar took her by the elbow and began to lead her out of the room.

Solona was washed in confusion and horror. Part of her hoped it was time for her harrowing, but another part of her couldn't help but be reminded of the interrogations some mages were made to go through a couple of years back. Her stomach was in knots as they passed through the mages quarters and into the Templars'. Her fears subsided slightly when she was led up another staircase to the floor above. The tower seemed endless at this point. She had never ventured so high, even in her fourteen years in the tower. They rounded one more corridor and began the trek up a final flight of stairs. As they reached the large door, one Templar turned the handle and pushed the door open for her. They each took a side at the doorway and Solona was left standing alone in the doorway.

* * *

The door swung open to the harrowing chamber and Cullen stiffened in his stance. Soon he would see who he would have to execute should their harrowing go wrong. The mage entered slowly, and the dim lighting made it difficult to make out the face of the apprentice. As they stepped further into the light, Cullen's heart caught in his throat. It was Solona. He tried to swallow hard, but the lump in his throat wouldn't cease.

When Solona entered the room, she immediately saw Greagor and Irving standing in the center of the room before her. Greagor looked as rigid as ever, but Irving had a kind smile on his face which made Solona relax a little. She saw the pedestal with the blue glowing substance on it in the middle of the room, and Irving waved her closer. As she approached, her eyes fell on the Templars on the far side of the room. There, standing in the middle of them was Cullen. Solona gasped. She stopped mid-step to stare at him. He fidgeted slightly under her gaze. Having heard of plenty harrowings, she knew what role Cullen had in this. She looked at him with saddened eyes, drawing her lips into a thin smile. Cullen sighed deeply before returning to his stoic stance. As she walked closer to Irving, Cullen felt nervous for the first time in years. He ran a thumb over the small protrusion the ring on his index finger gave from under his glove and sent a silent prayer to the Maker that he wouldn't have to drop his blade on this mage.

Solona nodded quietly as Irving explained the rules of the Harrowing to her.

"You are ready." Irving commented, a hint of pride in his voice as he motioned her to the pedestal.

She inhaled sharply before plunging her hand into the lyrium before her. It grew over her, and in an instant her mind was teleported to the fade. The onlookers watched as her body slumped to the ground, unconscious.  
Cullen did his best to steady his breath as he clutched the hilt of his sword at the ready. The minutes that passed felt like hours and they took their toll on Cullen's body. He felt immensely heavy all of a sudden. The harrowing chamber was deathly quiet as they all awaited the verdict.

Finally Irving's voice broke the silence.

"It is done. She has succeeded." The First Enchanter informed them enthusiastically.

Cullen let go of the breath he had been holding, and let his arms slack, letting his sword fall.

"Cullen." Greagor addressed.

Cullen stood at attention.

"Take this mage back to the apprentice quarters until she wakes."

"But Commander-" Cullen started to protest.

"That is an order." Greagor told him firmly.

Cullen nodded curtly, bringing a fist to his chest.

Cullen felt as if all eyes were on him as he crossed the chamber to the sleeping mage in the center. He approached her slowly. He bent down on one knee with out-stretched arms to scoop Solona into his arms. No one said a word, but Cullen couldn't stop the flow of blood to his cheeks. His face burned as he brought himself back to his feet and turned to exit the room.

The two Templars standing guard at the door nodded to Cullen as he passed by.  
As he walked down the stairs, he let his eyes fall on the sleeping Mage in his arms. He laughed despite himself at the irony of it all. How long ago was it that this same woman was sleeping in his arms as he brought her to her room after a long night in the library? His feet seemed to carry him there from memory as his attention was still transfixed on her soft features. She didn't make any noises this time, or nuzzle in closer to him. He was partly thankful for it, but the other part of him couldn't help but feel a little disappointed.

He entered her room quietly, this time with the knowledge of knowing where her bed was. He crossed the room slowly, almost dreading the moment he would have to part from her. He set her down carefully, brushing away some loose strands of hair from her face. He ducked away from her bed and stood, gaze still on her.

"Did she pass?" a somewhat familiar voice asked from the darkness.

"One of the best harrowings I've ever seen." Cullen responded with a smile on his lips.

"Thank the Maker."

"Send her to Irving when she wakes?" Cullen asked the voice.

"Of course."

And with that Cullen left.

* * *

The next morning rose with a bright sun that filled the rooms in the apprentice quarters with a blinding light. Solona opened her eyes, and rubbed away the last remnants of sleep before sitting up.

"Good you're awake." Jowan called, pushing himself off the wall in front of her.

"Ugh. I feel like I was hit with a brick." Solona responded, rubbing her head.

"So how was it?" he asked her nervously.

"Exactly as it sounds," she laughed, "harrowing."  
"What's wrong Jowan? You look like something is troubling you."

"It's nothing." He lied. "We'll talk later. Right now Irving wishes to speak with you."

"You're lying." Solona was genuinely concerned for her friend.

"Not here." He whispered. "Not now. Come find me after you talk to the First Enchanter."

Solona eyed him suspiciously. "Alright, if you say so."

Solona made herself presentable and prepared to head to the mage's quarters to see Irving. She overheard some of the other apprentice's gossiping further off in the room, but tried her best to ignore it. She was finally a full-fledged mage, so she hoped she wouldn't have to deal with them for a quite a while yet. There was a spring in her step as she exited the apprentice quarters and made her way to the stairs that led to her new quarters.

* * *

As she exited the stairwell and came into the mage's quarters she saw a familiar face, his back against the wall ahead of her. Solona took a deep breath. She remembered the look on his face when he saw her enter the harrowing chamber and felt her heart skip a little. She let go of her breath and sashayed her way over to Cullen, determined to get him to talk to her.

"Hello, Cullen." She announced playfully as she took a step beside him.

Cullen jolted slightly as he hadn't heard her approach. "Oh! H-hello S-Solona. I imagine congr-gratulations are in order." He told her, eyes straight ahead, fixed on the wall on the other side of the hall.

Solona chuckled lightly. "Are you alright Cullen?" she asked sweetly as she placed a hand on his shoulder. She felt him stiffen under her touch.

"Of c-course. Why do you a-ask?" Cullen's eyes began to flit back and forth, a red tinge beginning to rise in his cheeks.

Solona shrugged innocently.

"S-so they picked m-me to strike the killing blow if you-if you became an abomination." He blurted out. "I'm glad that it went well."

She smiled coyly and looked up at Cullen with large eyes. "Would you have really struck me down?" she asked as she lazily traced a finger up and down the arm of his armor.

Cullen's eyes began following her finger. "I-I would have felt terrible about it…but…but I have a duty to the Chantry," he cleared his throat, "and to the Maker, and I will do as I am commanded."

Solona's arm fell to her side and her face took on a look of dejection.

Cullen's heart sank. He never wanted to see her disappointed, especially by something he had said or done. He found a sliver of boldness as he hooked a finger under her chin, raising her eyes to his face.

"You understand that though, don't you?" he asked her softly.

Solona raised her eyes to meet his, and her breath caught as he stared into her with those breath-taking hazel eyes of his.

"C-Cullen?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

"Yes?"

"A-are you busy right now?" an idea sprang to her mind.

Cullen's hand fell from her chin, and he looked side to side.

"I-I'm on watch. Did-did you need something?" he asked, concern in his voice.

"Could you….Could we speak in private for a moment?" her grey eyes grew large again as she stared up at him.

Cullen's mouth opened and closed, looking for a response. He stepped aside, motioning to the room behind him that was conveniently empty.

Solona walked in first, Cullen close on her heels. Once inside, Cullen closed the door silently behind him and turned to see Solona staring into the fireplace. She looked at him, doubt flashing across her features for a split second. Cullen drew his brows in confusion as she approached him.

"Cullen…I-I see the way you look at me…" she confessed as she drew closer.

Cullen gulped loudly.

"Have you noticed? That I…I look at you the same?" she was standing directly in front of him, her toes meeting his.

His mouth fell agape, stunned. He didn't know how to respond. He could hardly believe this was actually happening.

Not waiting for a response, Solona lifted herself up on her tip-toes, leaning into Cullen. Her heart beat loud in her ears as she slowly brought her lips to his. Cullen's body stiffened in response. He froze for a moment, so many doubts rushing through his mind, all screaming that this was wrong; but one voice inside him began to whisper that this was right, then the whisper turned into a scream, and soon he softened and closed his lips around hers.

Solona let the smell of him engulf her. He smelt of metal and musk, and she reveled in it. Cullen's hands fell upon her body; they began to snake up her back, one finding its rest there in the small of her back as the other took to her hair, his fingers entwining in it, pulling her in deeper. She parted her lips, opening his in the process. Solona slid the tip on her tongue along the bottom of Cullen's, asking for admittance. He hungrily accepted her offer with his own tongue, dancing it around hers. Solona cursed the heavy armor of the Templars in the back of her head. What she wouldn't give to feel the warmth of his chest against her. Subconsciously her hands found the folds of his robes around his waist. She began to tug on the rich fabric, never breaking away from the sweet taste of his tongue on hers. When Cullen realized her intent, he pulled away slightly, hands grasping hers.

"What are you doing?" he breathed frantically.

"Cullen, I have wanted this for so long." She drawled between breaths.

"No. We cannot do this." He told her matter-of-factly as he began walking backwards towards the door.

"Wha-what do you mean?" she cried after him.

"I'm…I'm sorry." Was the only answer he gave her as he turned on his heel and rushed out the door.

Solona was left standing there alone, hurt and confused. She had been sure he wanted her as much as she did him. Why was he fighting this so much? She suddenly felt dirty, disgusted with her own actions. Solona folded her arms across her chest as if it would hide her shame. She remained in that empty room for a few minutes, trying to regain her composure. When she felt she could speak again, she stepped out of the room and scanned the corridor. Cullen was nowhere to be found. She was slightly relieved to not have to face him at that moment. Solona tried to put the matter behind her as she made her way to Irving's office.

* * *

When Solona approached the First Enchanter's office, she saw that he was not alone. Along with Irving, there was Greagor, and a man she had never seen before. She walked across the floor to meet them.

"Ah, there you are." Irving said with a smile, waving her over. "There is someone I would like you to meet."

Solona took a spot next to Irving.

"Allow me to introduce Duncan. He is the head of the Grey Wardens here in Ferelden." The First Enchanter continued.

"Irving has told me a great deal about you. I hear you had one of the quickest Harrowings Irving has ever seen." Duncan commented.

"You flatter me." Solona said sheepishly.

"And modest too." Duncan smiled.

"Duncan is here on behalf of our King. They are going to be fighting a horde of darkspawn at Ostagar, and are in need of some mages." The First Enchanter added.

"I'm also looking for potential new Grey Wardens." The elder Warden directed to Solona. "And I have only heard great things about you."

"It's bad enough that most of our Senior Enchanters have already been called off to battle!" Greagor interrupted. "Haven't you asked enough of us already?"

"It is their right Greagor." Irving attempted to cool the Knight-Commander.

"Is this why you summoned me, First Enchanter?" Solona questioned aloud.

"I had hoped you could get more acquainted with our guest, as well as show him to the guest quarters on this floor." Irving beamed.

"It would be my honor." Solona bowed slightly. "If you'll follow me, ser."

As Solona and Duncan exited the room, she could hear Irving and Greagor starting to argue behind them. Solona laughed under her breath. She couldn't even count on her fingers and toes how many times she has heard them arguing since she's been in the tower.

They walked in mostly silence as Solona lead the Warden Commander to the guest room near the end of the floor. He gave his thanks when they arrived and she nodded to him politely. When she exited the room, Jowan was standing in the hallway waiting for her.

"Have you finished talking with Irving?" he questioned.

"For now." She replied.

"Can I talk to you then?"

Solona nodded and proceeded to follow her friend back down the hall to the chapel. Jowan led her to the far west side of the chapel where a young initiate stood.

"Solona, meet Lily. This is the girl I told you about." Jowan motioned to the young lady beside him.

"An initiate?" she asked, shocked. "Isn't that forbidden?"

"What? And a mage with a Templar isn't?" he countered.

"Touché." Solona cocked an eyebrow towards her friend.

Jowan and Lily proceeded to inform Solona of the note Lily had seen, stating that Jowan was to be made tranquil since he was suspected of blood magic. Upon questioning, Jowan had denied having ever dabbled in the forbidden art. Solona reluctantly agreed to help the two with their plan of destroying Jowan's phylactery. They told her she needed a rod of fire, so off she went to the storage room. Once there she was told that she would need a signature from a senior enchanter. Solona worried that some of the enchanters would question her intent. A pit in her stomach grew. She knew that she shouldn't help Jowan do this. She cared deeply for her friend, but if they were caught all of them would be severely punished. She had just become a full-fledged mage, and didn't want to tarnish that already. She decided to go back to Irving.

Irving remained silent, stroking his beard as he listened to Solona reveal the plan. He instructed her to go ahead with the plan to have them catch Jowan and Lily in the act. Irving found the idea of bringing the initiates involvement to light almost too alluring. He signed the permission slip for the rod of fire, and told Solona to act as if Irving was still ignorant of their scheme. Part of Solona regretted betraying her friend like this, but it had to be done. It was her "duty", as Cullen might say.

Lily and Jowan were pleasantly surprised at the quickness that Solona had accomplished her task. Soon the three of them were off to the basement to carry out their plan. After some difficulties with opening the doors, Solona suggested a second route, which Irving had told her about. The other two hastily agreed. Their path was strewn with guards that had fallen at their hands, and the pit in Solona's stomach grew larger. Finally they reached the phylactery room through a hole they made in the wall and found Jowan's phylactery. As soon as the deed was complete, the three of them quickly headed back up stairs.

"Here are the culprits, Greagor." Irving stated as the three exited the stairs, stopping in their tracks.

"I scarcely wanted to believe that an initiate was involved, but I see you were correct." The Knight-Commander responded.

Jowan turned to his friend. "You told them?" he questioned, "How could you?! I thought we were friends!"

"You didn't leave me any choice, Jowan." Solona responded, tears threatening to fall.

Greagor instructed the other Templars to restrain Lily and have her taken to Aeonar.

"No!" Jowan screamed. "I won't let you touch her!" he then produced a small dagger from his robes, and proceeded to dig it into the palm of his hand. Blood sprang forth and he used it as a powerful force to knock back the Templars and the First Enchanter.

Lily screamed. She was hurt that Jowan had lied to her, and disgusted at the fact that he did indeed dabble in blood magic. Jowan tried to explain himself, but Lily didn't want to hear it. She told him that she never wanted to see him again and that she would accept her fate in Aeonar. Jowan fell silent. He didn't want to leave Lily, but now that he had marked himself as a blood mage, he wasn't left with much of a choice.

"You betrayed me." He directed to Solona. "I trusted you; now look what you've done!" he told her with hurt in his voice before he ran from the tower.

When Jowan had left, Lily was still frozen in place. Solona crossed the floor and began trying to help Irving and the Templars up. Once on their feet Greagor began to blame Solona for what had transpired and threatened to send her off to Aeonar as well. Irving stood in and told him that he had told Solona to act accordingly, but Greagor claimed that did not excuse her.

The commotion had alerted other members of the tower, causing other Templars to flood the hall, Cullen among them, and Duncan at their heels. Duncan pushed his way passed the other Templars and towards the center of argument. He caught bits and pieces of what was happening before making an announcement.

"This woman has done a service for her tower, and remained loyal to the First Enchanter, even against the behest of her friend. If you insist on punishment, I hereby invoke the right of inscription for this mage." He motioned to Solona.

"No! I will not allow it! She does not deserve to be awarded for these actions!" Greagor protested.

"It would be an honor, ser." Solona spoke up, bowing slightly to Duncan.

Greagor continued to attempt to argue, but he got nowhere.

"Duncan," Irving started, "could you please accompany Solona back to the guest quarters to have her pack her things. You should leave by morning."

Duncan nodded, motioning for Solona to follow him.

Solona followed the Warden quietly. When they passed by the gaggle of Templars in the hall, Solona met eyes with Cullen. His eyes were full of shock and, was that, grief? He said nothing as she passed, just continued to watch her as she retreated. When they reached the guest room, Duncan instructed her to collect only what she would _need _to leave the tower, as they would be leaving as soon as first light. She complied, gathering only a few small things in preparation for her very last night as a tower mage.

* * *

Late that night, after lights out and everyone had gone to sleep, aside from the very few Templars that had night duty; Solona lay awake in her bed. Her mind wouldn't let her rest. She was worried about tomorrow's journey, but more than that, her mind kept drifting back to Cullen. She was to be a Warden; she would probably never see him again. After about an hour of this, she couldn't take it anymore, she had to see him. She shot up from her bed, as quietly as she could, trying not to wake Duncan. She then slipped on her shoes and tip-toed out the door.

Solona silently made her way down the corridor, thankful that the Templar's quarters was only one floor up. She dipped into a doorway as a Templar approached, cloaking herself in shadow. Once she was sure he was gone, she continued on her path. She made her way up the stairs and paused for a moment in the archway trying to remember where Cullen's room had been. After a second, she finally recalled where it was and hastily made her way there.

Cullen had not been able to get a very good night's sleep either, dread rising in him, knowing that the one person he had come to care for over the years was to leave forever. He was awoken from his light sleep with a gentle knock on his door. He hesitantly pulled the covers off of himself and adorned the tight fitting leather breeches that lay on the floor by his bed. Cullen made his way to the door, placing an ear on the wood and asked who it was.

"Cullen?" he heard a small whisper from the other side of the door. The familiar voice made his heart jump. He fumbled with the old handle of the door, cracking it open. Her face appeared from behind the door, eyes pleading for him to let her in. He opened the door wide enough for her to slip in. Once she stepped inside, Cullen closed the door tight behind her. No sooner had he turned to face her than she had rushed to him, her arms flying around his waist as she buried her head in his chest.

"Cullen!" she choked, swallowing back tears. He was so warm. She felt that she could stay against him like this forever. Solona was starting to doubt her choice of leaving with Duncan.

Cullen was shocked. He stood there with her around him, his arms out in the air. He looked down at the figure holding onto him and the sight pulled on his heart strings. He enveloped her in his arms, holding her tight, resting his chin on the top of her head. They stayed like that for a good minute before Solona spoke up.

"I'm sorry." She whispered against his muscled chest.

Cullen drew his brows together. "For what?" he questioned, not moving from her.

"For…earlier…" she responded shyly. "I shouldn't have…have tried to-" she was having a hard time finding the right words.

Cullen pulled away slightly, still holding her in his arms, but enough to look into her face.

"I'm the one that should apologize." He stated quietly as he cupped one of her cheeks in his hand.

Solona nuzzled into his palm, remembering the day by the lake. "I just felt like such a fool." She confessed.

He lifted her face to his, meeting her gaze. "Never feel like a fool for going for what you want." A serious note hung in his tone. "I'm the fool for leaving you like that. I'm just…I'm just a coward." This time it was Cullen who dropped his gaze.

Solona leaned up and planted a small peck on his lips. "We have some horrid timing, don't we?" she gave a weak chuckle.

A small smirk tugged at the corner of his lips. "So what do we do now?"

"What do you _want_ to do now?" she asked impishly.

Cullen chocked on his saliva. Even in the darkness, Solona could make out the blush that burned his face; she couldn't help but fully laugh now. He tried to compose his face in a serious manner.

"Solona…I respect you far too much to bed you and possibly never see you again." He told her as he rested his forehead against hers.

"But what if that was my last request?" she asked, disappointed.

Cullen stared down at her luscious pouting lip; it took all of his reserve to not take it between his teeth and suckle on it. He closed his eyes, inhaling sharply.

"As much as I would love nothing more than to fulfill your wish, I just…can't." he breathed.

"Your vows." She stated dully.

"In part." Cullen grimaced. "But it's mostly because I…I think-I think I've falle-"

Solona shook her head vigorously against him, stopping him mid-word. "Don't say it." She begged. "If you do, I don't think I could bring myself to leave." Tears burned hot against her lids. She tried to blink them away, but a single tear slipped through, trailing down her cheek.

Cullen ran the pad of his thumb over her cheek, wiping the tear away as he tried to stifle a sniffle himself. She remained in his embrace for a stretch of time, but ended up pulling away reluctantly.

"I should go." She stated, voice low. She began to turn away when he grabbed her by the wrist.

"Wait." He called after her. "I never repaid you for your gift." His eyes fell to the ring on his hand.

"It's fine." She dismissed with a sad smile. "I didn't give it to you to get anything in return."

"I know, but that doesn't mean I don't want to show you my thanks. Here. Take this." He told her as he slipped a chain from around his neck, handing it to her. He placed the trinket in her palm, enclosing her fingers around it.

"Cullen….I-"

"I've had it since I can remember," he told her, voice trailing off, "I want you to have it. It has protected me all these years, and I hope it will do the same for you. You know…protect you…in my absence."

Solona looked down at the amulet in her hand. It was exquisitely crafted. It was made of silver and also bore the symbol of Andraste engraved on it. "I'll cherish it forever." She told him enthusiastically as she threw her arms around his neck, pulling him in for a deep, farewell kiss.

Cullen pulled her close to his body, losing himself in her lips. She left him with one last light kiss as they parted.

"I'll miss you." her voice barely above a whisper.

"And I, you." he assured, still holding her.

She gave him the biggest smile that she could muster, breaking away from him. Cullen held onto her hand for as long as possible as she trailed off toward the door, letting it fall as she exited. Solona did her best to not look back as she passed through the door; it was hard enough leaving him as it was. Tears streamed down her face as she hurried back to the guest room.

Cullen stood still in the same spot she had left him. He felt uncomfortably cold without the heat of her body against him. His mind felt numb; as if all of his senses had fled the moment she left the room. He wouldn't sleep that night. Visions of their few encounters flashing in his mind's eye every moment. Cullen would give himself this one thing this night; for once she was gone, he would banish these thoughts from his head.

* * *

Solona was dead quiet the next morning. She and Duncan gathered their things as soon as the first rays of the sun shone into the window of the guest room. All who were awake that morning nodded respectfully as they passed on their way to the tower's entrance. Irving was waiting for them in the foyer, and on the far wall, there stood Cullen. Solona could only focus on him as Irving congratulated her and talked with Duncan. They held each other's longing stares, but soon she was gone; on her way to Ostagar to join the Grey Wardens, and more than likely, never to see the tower, or Cullen, again.


End file.
